This is a new and improved version of the previous video I posted. This version has more pictures too. Please check it out. Thank you for stopping by.
This is a new and improved version of the previous video I posted. This version has more pictures too. Please check it out. Thank you for stopping by.
I have been using my diaper Genie for nearly five years now. I have tried plain garbage bags of different varieties but the smell is too much to handle. I always go back to my Diaper Genie. I have used Target up and up refill bags, an organic option from target, some generic option at my local grocery store and of course Diaper Genie brand. I thought I could save money by using generic or off brands of bags but it proved to be a waste of money and really stunk, literally. The other issue is the amount of refill bags you get are about half that of the Diaper Genie brand. The smell is not contained in the other brands either. So I think that you save your nose and wallet by shelling out the extra cash for Diaper Genie brand refills. They go a long way and keep the smell contained. I would say the Diaper Genie brand refill bags last me two to three times longer than the other brands. Check them out for yourself on Amazon at the link below.
This is a sample of photos on my instagram page. I love posting photos of everything and anything that I find interesting. Please click on my pics to check it out if you are so inclined.
We have all been there, parent shamed. It’s not a fun place to be. We all do it to other parents and often don’t realize it. Why do we feel the need to beat up on each other? Aren’t we all in this together?
We all have that one family member or friend that gives unsolicited advice. We all have that part of us that thinks we are the best parent some days and other days we cry into our pillow thinking, we suck at parenting. I spend my nights, after the kids are sleeping, thinking about my day. Was it successful or did it suck? Could I have been a better mom? What can I change and do better tomorrow ? Other days I have a really big ego and think, your so awesome at this parenting thing.
I have a relative, who may be reading this, who isn’t supportive in the way I would like. It’s like a constant comparison between kids and parenting that has my brain in a whirlwind daily. I decided this past month ,more seriously this week, that I need to get my poop together. I need to make decisions with confidence and execute them with authority. I’m my own person and I choose to parent how I feel is best for my kids. I am choosing to feel good about myself and how I raise my children. If someone looks down on me for something I did for my kids or how I discipline, that is ok. These are my kids and my life. I need to take charge in all aspects of life. How else will my kids navigate life if I am a crappy parent because I bow to others idea of what kind of parent /person I should be. We are all different. I will take some ideas or advice where I see fit but ultimately I need to make my kids happy and allow them to grow into healthy adults. I want them to be confident and well rounded. I need to be the best example of that.
Too often I’m hearing from friends or on social media, how so-called perfect parents are shaming other parents. The worst kind is the non parent giving advice. We have all done that because we think we know better. We didnt know better. They don’t even do this in a nice helpful way. They are down right nasty and unapologetic. You NEED to breastfeed, you HAVE to let them cry it out, circumcision is barbaric. You HAVE to use this kind of bottle or stroller. Don’t co-sleep. They go on to tell how their kids are perfect, we know damn well they arent, and how you just dont know or want what’s best for your kids. I had a friend tell me, her relative told her, she is a bad mom because she “let’s her depression get in the way” of how she parents. How, her kids behave for this relative better than for her. We have all heard this. The fact is that kids are very hard on their parents and act out because that’s how they are. They fight for attention over siblings. They are still trying to regulate emotions and they look to you to guide them, even if by acting horribly bratty. They throw tantrums and all the other fun stuff. Thry are kids, doing what kids do. They dont usually behave that way for others because it’s a different environment with different expectations. Mainly, no expectations except to have fun and play. At home there are more rules and different consequences. If your doing it right or different, then other parents will try to knock you down. They like you being miserable or looking to them for advice when they know they struggled too. Maybe they are currently struggling and looking to lift themselves up by knocking your parenting. They want to believe they’ve done every thing perfectly. Guess what? There is not just one way to parent so get over yourself. More importantly, get over your self doubt. Dont let thrm take jabs at your depression or anything else.
That’s my mission. These kids grow to fast and before you know it they are off to college. Enjoy them while you can. Let the negative energy go and feel the freedom of not caring what other parents are claiming you did wrong. Kids are all different and we need to parent them in the way that’s best for them. We need to support each other and lift each other up. If you can’t say anything nice then shut up.
This happens a lot with first time parents. You will get more unsolicited advice than you know what to do with. For this reason, I now either give advice only when asked or I will say this is what worked for me. I am guilty of trying to make my case for the best diaper or formula etc. I now realize that every baby is different in how they react to diapers and formula. Some parents prefer different diapers than me and its ok. Some parents don’t feel the need to put a hat on a baby in the sun but it’s not my business. Some parents co sleep and some dont. Guess what, its ok. Don’t beat yourself up as a new parent because someone is against you or your pediatricians advice either. I won’t get into the vaccine debate. I will say at times I’ve been on both sides of it because some kids will ultimately have adverse reactions. Don’t shame those parents. Do educate yourself on all things baby related and do what you feel is right. Ask as many questions and seek advice from many resources but make choices based on what is right for your family. You dont have to argue with people but don’t let them walk on you. The bottom line is, parenting is not as easy as it looks! Be kind to new moms or dads. Be kind to all parents. Be uplifting and helpful and learn when to shut up. I hope this helped someone or hopefully it’s just relatable. Have a fabulous day and thank you for reading.
I love my Diaper Genie. Its been with me for two children now and still going strong. The Diaper Genie bags are the best for smell/odor and it seems like the most bag for your money. Other brands of bags that are compatible work ok. I think the others are thinner by comparison and run out quicker despite some advertising that they hold the same amount of diapers but maybe it’s just me. Its one of those “you get what you pay for” scenarios. Its easy to clean the pail itself, which can get stinky. I do this about once a week lightly and sanitize it thoroughly about once a month or so. Some folks I have asked don’t clean it at all, eek. When you think of what your putting in there and the fact that the kids inevitably touch it, you need to clean it at some point. The problem I have encountered is, when you push too hard and overfill the genie, it breaks. Luckily, it can be put back together. Thats where it gets tricky though. I don’t know if I am just that dumb that I can’t figure out how to put together a garbage pail or if others find this thing difficult but it’s hard. Luckily we have Google and Youtube. I found a gentlemen who did a tutorial on how to put this complex diaper disposal system back together. After watching it like 10 times, I kid you not, I am proud to say we are back in business. I gave up and went back to it and like magic, it works once again. I am giving you this magic link, https://youtu.be/7P9A_D-HeXs to show you how you too can learn the complex disposal systems inner workings lol. It really made my night. I hope this helps another parent or caregiver out there struggling with this garbage can. Thank you for reading and feel free to comment.
I don’t understand why everyone complains on Facebook about what others write. I thought to each his own opinion still applied. I guess I understand ,if the majority of folks are outraged at someone’s comments , you can expect a barrage of comments. If you are simply giving your opinions or two cents on a topic, then you shouldn’t be subject to someone giving a lecture on Facebook about how everyone in the world is so blind and we are the reasons this country is going to hell in a hand basket. They are one of the two percent of the world that knows all. You can’t expect many friends to stick around with this attitude. I guess if I were that intelligent and everyone around me seemed beneath me ,I would do the same. I get annoyed at others comments ,especially if they don’t mirror mine, but who doesn’t! I don’t go around telling those people how stupid they are and how they are controlled by the media and whoever else forces their views on us idiots of society. Everyone has varying backgrounds and educations and not everyone is an expert in everything. I think that’s what makes life interesting. If you happen to be a lawyer with a medical degree and a plumbing license ,and perhaps you are an ordained minister who is also a chef, well then good for you. That is an awesome list of accomplishments. As you can probably tell from reading my posts, I’m not in that group. I like to keep up with current events and such and I like to keep up with celebrity gossip. I like watching the Discovery Channel, Forensic specials, renovation shows and sometimes Keeping Up With the Kardashians. I’m not holding a high degree but I’m not an idiot so to say. If I don’t understand something about government or the justice system, I ask. I research the information so I can be better informed but I’m not lawyer and I’m not a member of government so maybe I don’t get it right all the time. I’m not a doctor but maybe I have life experience enough to weigh in on a topic. Should I be punished for ignorance of the facts on Facebook? I think maybe if I posted something ignorant ,without intending to offend or come off uneducated, then maybe the high and mighty could step down from the soap box and explain to me why I might be wrong or misguided. If the soap box King or Queen isn’t an expert on the topic of the day then maybe just say, this is my unprofessional opinion. These folks suck all the joy out of Facebook. For me Facebook serves as a place to talk to family or friends/acquaintances and to weigh in on the hot button topics or whatever else is going on. It serves as a distraction from the stress of the day. If it becomes a hostile place where people are way to serious and are offended by everything, then it only adds stress. In the end I have decided to limit my social media time significantly. If I keep blogging about it ,then maybe I need to step back because maybe Im getting to involved in this idle chit chat. Why do folks needs to ruin this? My thought for the day, please feel free to chime in.
Ok ,so I know that most all posts of mine have been about self pity in essence but then that’s why I blog, isn’t it? It’s not about pity really, but rather a way to express my feelings rather than going nuts and flipping out on people. This blog is more of the same I suppose but you be the judge. Mainly my complaint today is that of selfish people. When I get a call from someone and I can’t get a word in about anything important or trivial, it really burns my backside. My favorite is when I am told, that’s not important but let me tell you who I saw at the store or whatever they wish to interrupt with. Some of my family members are especially good at this. It is ,however, equally upsetting when you have a friend who is an excellent listener but never divulges anything. I’m not talking deep dark secrets or personal info either. I think that’s what friends talk about, or at least they used to, but not anything of substance. I might inquire about a troubling issue they have been going through and they just say , oh I’d rather not get into it. I might ask how is your job and they say oh you know, same old …same old. I have to question if I’m the crappy friend in this scenario ,since they are not willing to talk about anything other than my contribution to the conversation. In any case, I just wonder why friendships or even relating to relatives has become so difficult for me in my old age(only in my thirties, but still). Your family is supposed to be supportive. My theory is that I allowed them to see me for too long as a spineless and weak person. I was the butt of everyone’s jokes and told that I was paranoid about what people thought about me. I was told I always overreacted to people and situations. They tell a sort of pre story to everyone so that they judge me based on that character they created and that I inevitably became in so many ways. It was not how I wanted anyone to see me but it seemed a lovable character that was welcomed at least. Whenever I show confidence or stand up for myself by saying, hey that isn’t me, it’s not what I like or how I really am at all, it is met with a less than stellar response. I never really became assertive or confident until after high school and believe it or not ,that old persona I let them create for me ,didn’t go away. After all, I played that role because it was less stressful than the constant battle to let my true self shine through. Recently a person introduced into the family said to me, well we all know you hate everyone and everything and your sensitive and hard to please. I was blown away by this because they didn’t get to know me but the image my family created instead. I told them that they shouldn’t believe what they heard because it’s not me. Every action I take is met with , oh that’s so typical of you. I bet you will do this or that next. Um, you don’t even know me…my family doesn’t even know the real me. So I guess it’s partly my fault for living up to these things they wanted me to be. It just sucks because I’m now treated like a weak and angry and paranoid character. You try so hard to better yourself and reinvent yourself to no avail. I can just be sitting back and listening to what’s going on and they will try to egg me on to do or say what they expect me to. When I don’t respond on cue, they say…wow what’s your problem. So I guess I kind of answered my own question as to why I get treated how I do but when friends who don’t know your family dynamic judge you based on one conversation with your family, it’s just tiring trying to defend your true self. The more I defend myself, the worse it gets because it’s viewed as me trying to cover up my alleged behaviors. It makes me look as if I am the one fabricating the story. The thing is, why it’s been bothering me again after so many years, is that it’s become a problem for me to have them paint this picture for my son. I have talked to at least two or three of these folks and let them know not to act this way in front of my son but they don’t care. They simply don’t care about anyone but themselves. They never think they are wrong. If I do something and someone tells me not to because it hurts them in some way, then I stop. Even when I think it’s funny or they are overreacting, it’s still bothers them so I won’t do it. In one case my brother asked me not to say certain things about him in front of his kids, ok no problem. I realized kids are impressionable. Now that I have a child I asked for the same courtesy but guess what….sorry it’s funny..that’s what they say. Ok…NO it’s not funny. Ok well I’ve gone off in several directions on this blog so now I will wrap it up with this question, ….Is it ever ok to allow your family to continue treating you in ways that you don’t like because they are family and you can’t change people? Or should you put your foot down continually and if they won’t even compromise then you cut ties? Same thing for friends, easier to get rid of than family. Ok I guess that’s more than one question. Any thoughts on this topic? Please feel free to comment.
This past weekend we celebrated my grandmothers 95th birthday. A mind blowing concept,living to be 95. Nana or gigi ,as she is fondly referred to , didn’t want anyone to fuss over her birthday. She is at an age where she has survived a great many of her family members. Nana´s parents, siblings, cousins,husband, friends, a daughter and a grandchild have passed before her. This is something which saddens her and causes her depression and loneliness. While we are all super happy she is still here to celebrate her 95th birthday, she reflects back on all of those who have gone before her. I think she struggles the most with the loss of my Aunt Gayle, her daughter. She was very close with my aunt, even living next door to her for many years. We lost my Aunt Gayle a few years ago to cancer and my mother a few years prior to cancer. In fact, Gigi lost her sisters to cancer too and over the years it seemed as if she lost a sibling every year or so. This can take a toll on a person. She lived through the depression, and yet with all of her grandkids to put a smile on her face and the modern conveniences of the times, she suffers through a depression of a different nature. It just really makes you think. I hope I continue to experience life and all it has to offer, and I hope to have a positive attitude in doing so. My grandmother has been a hard worker her whole life, and though arthritis and age are catching up to her, she still tends to her garden and tries to keep her independence despite being unable to do things like she used to. She and my Uncle Frank (Aunt Gayles husband) are next door to each other. This is a great advantage to both of them now that they are widows. They keep each other company and look out for each other. I hate using that word ,widow, because it sounds depressing but nevertheless this is where life has put them. All in all I am amazed and blessed to have witnessed this 95 year old woman, born in 1919-lived through the depression-mother of 3-used to work in city hall-grandmother to ten(did i count right?)-the list goes on, still having the spunk of a thirty something. She still knows how to laugh and tell a good story. I hope that everyone, including myself, takes a page from her book. I only wish she didn’t have to suffer so much tragedy so she could enjoy everyday to the fullest, though somehow she manages to smile. I love you Nana, Happy 95th birthday!